Friday, 26 July 2013


I saw someone have an epileptic fit the other day. People stood around gawping, wondering what to do. Then one wag piped up and suggested that the poor inflicted soul be thrown in a bath with some detergent so that they could do their washing.

I can't believe the ignorance of some people. It is common knowledge that people having epileptic fits frequently soil themselves, due to their loss of muscle control. I can't see how that would help remove those stubborn stains and ground in dirt.

Monday, 22 July 2013

School Lies!

During our school days we trusted our teachers implicitly. The word of our teachers equated to those of God. However, looking back from a better informed stand point, we are able to recognise we were duped. Take science lessons for instance. Like many school children before and since, I faced the prospect of learning the periodic table. What a sham that turned out to be. It is now become obvious that sulphur is just powdered egg. That is probably just the tip of the iceberg. Who knows what cobalt really is!

Sunday, 14 July 2013


Most major supermarkets have a range of Fairtrade products. There are also many independent stores exclusively stocking similar goods. Unfortunately, we don't always get a fair trade. I have to confess that I have been conned in the past in pursuit of a noble cause. I purchased a jar of Fairtrade coffee at an inflated price, only to find that it tasted like top soil. How is this a fair trade?

However, after a little more thought, I've come to realise that we did probably swap the country of the peasant farmer that produced the aforementioned crap for a string of beads and a looking glass. Perhaps the fair trade is just them getting their own back.

Sunday, 7 July 2013


I have to confess that I did watch some of the tennis today. I was not the only one to make an error of judgement. I noticed Wayne Rooney in the crowd looking perplexed. I think he was in Wimbledon looking for Wombles, and just took a wrong turn.
I watched only briefly. However, it was sufficient time to form the conclusion, that the thing I hate most about Wimbledon is that I will never get that time back again!

Wednesday, 3 July 2013

Science V Religion

The Science V Religion debate has been around for eons. Both have their supporters and detractors. If I were ill, I would certainly consult a doctor, trusting in the science of his profession. However, that is not to say that I follow scientific theories blindly. After all, they are only theories.
Much of the debate concerns evolution v creation. Both defy logic. Evolution basically involves a fish that crawls up onto the land, and is fortunate enough the meet another crawling fish. They mate and have a baby monkey who grows up to meet another monkey. They in turn breed and yet another step is taken along the evolutionary path towards are present existence.
Creationists believe all things were made by God. Differing religions have different theories on how their own version of the supreme being went about his business. Then there are always those that like to combine the two and throw aliens into the mix just to complicate matters.
Personally, I tend to side with religion. Not because it is any more logical, but because I'm lazy. The seeds were planted back during my school days. Science lessons involved potions, compounds, periodic tables, complicated Latin names and difficult equations. Where as Religious Studies, Divinity or Ethics as it is frequently referred to today, was usually taught by a wet liberal that told stories and rarely sought retribution for neglected homework.
Probably the best option would have been to side with Physical Education. A good healthy sports obsession can eliminate the need to even consider such complex ethical questions.

Gladiators ready!