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Friday 16 August 2013

Battle Rhino!

Steven Spielberg's movie War Horse was a tremendous box office success. It also had the critics singing his praises once again. You can't really argue with the financial returns. However, I think he could have improved the story line with a little bit of tinkering with the script.

The idea of a horse caught in the horrors of trench warfare will no doubt tug on a few heart strings, but it isn't really the best choice of animal for the environment. A horse is somewhat limited in it's fighting capacity. So why not swap the horse for a rhino?

Unleashing a rhino across no-mans-land would surely cause havoc in the German trenches. Especially once it catches a glimpse of the spikes on the German helmets popping up above the trenches. It's just a matter of plying the rhino with the right aphrodisiac and sending it over the top. Although powdered rhino horn might not be the wisest choice under the circumstances.

Once the rhino drops down into the German's trenches the ensuing chaos would surely make for a thoroughly enthralling movie masterpiece.

27 comments:

  1. You are clearly a lunatic......but a very funny one!

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  2. Battle rhino, I would definitely watch that movie.

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  3. What was going through your head when you came up with this?

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  4. I never need an aphrodisiac

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  5. Where would they get the rhinos?

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  6. As mad as it seems, I would love to see this movie.

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    Replies
    1. yes i am sure it would be a stunning movie to watch.. hehehe

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  7. Wouldn't the rhinos be shot to pieces by machine guns?

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    1. Firstly, a rhino could take far more hits before going down than a man or horse. German WW1 machine guns were not very powerful. Secondly, the fact that it could spare the lives of men is the main point.

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  8. War Horse made me cry. I'm sure Battle Rhino would make me laugh. Battle Rhino wins!

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  9. Replies
    1. A War Ant would be good for tunnelling.

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    2. I don't think the tunnel would be big enough to achieve anything.

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  10. Totally bonkers! Have you been drinking? LOL!

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  11. War Giraffe would be crap. The Huns would pick him off too easily as his head would stick up above the trench.

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  12. A giraffe might not make a good attacking weapon, but hollow out the neck and head and it could make a good trench periscope.

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  13. What kind of a maniac hollows out a giraffe?

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    1. haha Joan it must be the wierd kind lol just think of the smell!! haha

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    2. a lunatic who wants to use it as a trench periscope... obviously!! but a lunatic for sure!!! what good would the giraffe be when returned to the plains in Africa with a periscope in its neck? These lunatics have no foresight!!

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  14. Perhaps the British fleet could have used the assistance of a few whales at Jutland.

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  15. we... it isn't THAT far fetched... whales are VERY big and love the sea... and they don't require fuel, only plankton.... so it wouldn't cost anything to 'run them'... Certainly worth thinking about... but they wouldn't be any good using them as periscopes in the trenches!!

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