Once again Christmas is upon us. On the big day, countless folk around our great nation will be tucking into a turkey dinner, accompanied by an abundance of booze. They will then settle down as a family in front of the television to feast on a vast array of audio visual delights with a seasonal twist.
Unfortunately, it has all become a little predictable. The will be The Vicar of Dibley Christmas Special, where we get to see the big fat female vicar munch her way through numerous Christmas dinners in an attempt not to disappoint any of her parishioners. Then there will by the Morecambe and Wise Christmas Special and the Two Ronnies Christmas Special, where we get to laugh at old 1970s sexiest jokes whilst proclaiming them timeless classics!
Staying with the theme of Timeless Classics, there is always the Top of the Pops Christmas Special. Where we get to sing along to all those tunes that we have been pelted with endlessly since the beginning of December.
There will be a Call the Midwife Christmas Special, where poverty tugs at our heart strings, before being replaced by a nice inner warmth when a new life in brought into the world and some nuns sing some lovely Christmas carols.
Downton Abbey Christmas Special gives us a glimpse of how rich people enjoyed Christmas 100 years ago at the expense of the poor.
However, despite all these festive offerings, I can't help feeling that the television producers are missing a trick.
How great would The Walking Dead Christmas Special be? I can picture the scene. A small group of survivors trapped on the roof of a tower block. Ammunition is low. food supplies are down to their last squirrel. The zombies are making their way onto the roof. There is no way down and nowhere to hide. Our weary group of survivors ready themselves for what looks like their last battle to the death.
When all looks lost, the sound of sleigh bells raise eyes skywards. Can it be? Yes it is! It's Santa to the rescue. A couple of heavily armed elves spray bullets at the advancing undead hoard, Whilst Donner and Blitzen do a River Dance on zombie skulls, spreading brains and eyeballs across the snow covered roof. Our heroes are saved. To add to their joy, Daryl Dixon puts a crossbow bolt through the neck of Dasher, so it's reindeer for Christmas dinner.
Who wouldn't want to watch that? It would certainly brighten up my Christmas day!
I can't believe that some people actually cry when chopping onions!
I don't even cry whilst chopping puppies!
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