Smoking Beagles

I value human life above that of any animal. Except perhaps bears. Bears are cool. However, I find the practise of forcing beagles to smoke unacceptable. I know  I'm not alone in expressing this sentiment. Dog owners across the globe have not been shy about voicing their objections. Unfortunately, I'm not sure that releasing a pack of canines with a twenty a day habit back into the community is such a good idea.

There still remains the need for research into smoking, just as long as it blights our society. So I suggest replacing beagles with dolphins.There are two obvious advantages in this. Firstly, should the dolphins develop cancer, they wouldn't have to worry about losing their hair during chemotherapy. Secondly, their blow holes make ideal ashtrays.