Wolves

I recently watched a documentary about a boy that had been raised by wolves. He had adopted many of their characteristics. For example, eating raw meat, howling at the moon and the inability to play football.

At a glance, such an existence would appear unfavourable. However, on closer examination, it is evident that such an upbringing does provide certain advantages. Trivial niceties and manners become redundant, politics become irrelevant, whilst ripping undesirables to bits and feasting on them would surely be forgivable. In fact, a lupine childhood would excuse all manner of taboo activities.

I was abandoned in the wilderness at an early age myself. Being raised by dandelions left few mental scars. Although to this very day, I am still unable to tell the time without sufficient wind.