Coulrophobia

Fear of clowns has become so common place that there is now a recognised term for it, Coulrophobia.

I'm not talking about the clowns in parliament, although we probably have good reason to fear them. I'm talking about the ones you find in the circus, advertising in McDonald's or on a night out in Norfolk (also known as locals). You know the ones, red nose, big feet, clothes like a hippie's car seat cover.

I wouldn't say I fear clowns, but I am certainly suspicious of them. Anyone whose car breaks down that frequently but doesn't swear is clearly not normal. Also, most shoe shops have an upper limit in shoe size. Where do they buy their shoes?

Apparently in America they even have Clown Schools. There's quite a prestigious one called Harvard.