Prison

Prisons are in the news again today. For once it makes a pleasant change to note that it isn't the poor prison officers getting unnecessary criticism. Today the emphasis is on the quality of life granted to the inmates. The media are making claims that the life of prisoners incarcerated in our prisons is unacceptably easy, and prisons consequently provide no deterrent to would be criminals. This all being at the expense of the tax paying public.

This is causing quite a moral dilemma for the government. They are reluctant to dip their hands in their pockets to provide a meaningful prison service that challenges and rehabilitates offenders, whilst providing a safe environment for staff and prisoners alike. Instead, they are reducing the pay of prison officers, demanding greater contributions for their pensions, reducing staff numbers, reducing the length of sentences and sweeping crimes under the carpet to improve their statistics. Hence life  is getting increasingly more dangerous to the general public, as crime increasingly becomes a lifestyle choice for many, whilst many of the crimes they commit go unpunished. Likewise, life inside prison similarly becomes more dangerous as the lack of staff creates further opportunities for violence and criminal activities.

Much of the topical debate is centred around television, which is readily available to every prisoner. It is argued that television has a calming effect on prisoners by relieving boredom. Other than allowing them to see what their families are up to, on the Jeremy Kyle Show, there is no evidence to suggest that it has any beneficial qualities. There has certainly been no reduction in the amount of criminal activities taking place in our prisons since the introduction of televisions in prison cells. If anything, it has had a negative effect. Literary rates amongst prisoners are falling as fewer prisoners now read books.

It is argued that television can be used as a tool of manipulation. Removing the television for a few days is supposed encourage hardened criminals to have a change of heart and turn from their lives of crime. Now I maybe accused of being a bit of a sceptic, but I'm not sure that is going to work. I would like to see slightly more pro-active means employed. How about the reintroduction of the Judas Chair.

This lovely device was has been a part of terror since the middle ages and there are reports of it still being used to this day in certain parts of the world. The concept is simple, you place the person on the pyramid shape and allow their own weight to bring the pain.

The tip of the pyramid is usually inserted in the anus, vagina or under the testicles. Depending on the mood of the interrogator the punished could be rocked or dropped down on it repeatedly. Guaranteed to break ones spirit and  back passage.

Alternatively, having to share a cell with the likes of Max Clifford, Jim Davidson or Freddie Starr might also have a significant impact on negative behaviour.