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Thursday, 22 August 2013

White Van Man

Apparently, White Van Man has become the new social leper of our highways and byways. Double parking, cutting up other motorists and wiping out cyclists, as they go about their business of disposing of dead bodies and fly tipping.
Their lack of good manners and charm do little to endear them to other road users. However, that does not mean they are without comedy value. Especially if you happen to be a pedestrian. Next time a white van slows to make a idiotic manoeuvre within arms reach, try banging loudly on the side whilst shouting with venom in your voice that the driver is a pervert and hanging is too good for him. Then chuckle with glee as the Jeremy Kyle fodder leap to your assistance with bricks and a verbal torrent of their own. The police are unlikely to be called due to the lack of MOT, Car Tax and valid insurance.
Fun times!

21 comments:

  1. We should be allowed to throw bricks at them anyway.

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  2. I once had a boyfriend who drove a white van he was always trying to get me in the back for sex. It turned out that he still lived with his mother, so he couldn't take me home.

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    Replies
    1. There is no way I would date a white van driver

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  3. Why are they all fat or covered with crap tattoos/

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  4. Why do they never wash their vans?

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  5. I doubt they even wash themselves.

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  6. I can't stand those white vans. Either they are in my way or they are cutting me off in traffic. And I'm always worried that something is going to fall out the back and on top my truck.

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    Replies
    1. Truck drivers are even worse.

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  7. You're not wrong about the fly tipping. There is rubbish and rubble all down the lanes near me.

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  8. They're all wankers

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  9. Lol it s horrible and especial if you have to rent one.

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  10. I wouldn't mind them so much if they were good looking

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  11. Scum of the road

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  12. I tried this and it actually worked. Two teenage guys joined in shouting abuse. I can't believe how stupid people can be.

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  13. Why do they think it is ok to park on the pavement?

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  14. There's a guy by me who drives a white van with a dirty mattress in the back. Despite his best efforts, I bet he's still a virgin.

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  15. Hey not all white van drivers are like that. Although my van is more of a weekend camper I suppose?

    The idea of a dirty mattress is funny though, I have proper seats which convert in to a bed so at least it doesn't look seedy when people look inside.

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    Replies
    1. Classy.............not!

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