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Wednesday, 18 December 2013

The Romanians Are Coming!

The advent of the new year will be greeted by hoards of Romanians heading to our shores. Many of the population await their coming with fear and dread. However, I will be welcoming them with open arms.
Romania has a stray dog problem. Thousands of rabid canines roam their streets. However, one creative chap promised to solve his town's dog problem if he was to be elected mayor. Consequently, he was duly elected. The man was true to his word. On being elected, he proceeded to feed all of the town's stray dogs to the lions in the local zoo.

That kind of forward thinking is welcome. Although I would take it a bit further. We could thoroughly cleanse are streets by disposing of the junkies, drug pushers and chav scum that make many areas of our green and pleasant land a living hell for the local residents. With that lot out of the way there will be a few more quid available to the good honest folk.


24 comments:

  1. What about the Bulgarians?

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  2. You can start by feeding the scum that gather out the front of my place spitting and swearing and threatening people. I would pay good money to see them fed to the lions.

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  3. Beware a sharp tongue! It may cut deep on its way back in!

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    Replies
    1. Nothing wrong with a bit of tongue

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    2. Mmmmm.... I agree totally... love to use mine ;)

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    3. A sharp tongue would be able to get to all of those hard to reach places.

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  4. Good idea, but I would prefer it if we came out of Europe.

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  5. I agree Chloe!! I wonder if we decided to go to another EU country penniless whether we would be welcomed with open arms, a council house to live in, free medical and dental treatment and cash handouts to support our extravagant lifestyle?
    So, why don't we simply send our junkies and scum over to Romania and Bulgaria? Seems like a fair swap!!!

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  6. We should have a point system like in Australia.

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  7. Replies
    1. I don't have a big enough car but I'll always try to make room. The dirtier the better

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  8. a lot of the pick pockets in Italy are Romanian

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  9. Do do do do do we're lovin' it!

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  10. How do they get the cows into the car?

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  11. They're welcome to McDonalds. It tastes like crap!

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    Replies
    1. We'll end up with fat scroungers.

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  12. Were they not worried that the lions would get rabies?

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    Replies
    1. At least rabies wouldn't make the lions anymore dangerous.

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