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Wednesday, 22 October 2014

Cats

If you're a bit of a fat ugly munter, finding a partner or even a friend can be difficult. A lonely, but brief life stretches before you.
Don't lose heart, you can always get a pet. Obviously a dog is out of the question. We all know how you feel about exercise. So why not consider a cat? Cats pretty much take care of themselves, leaving you free to stuff your face.
For fat ugly people, owning cats is also a selfless act. You are clearly a heart attack waiting to happen. As a single lonely person, some unfortunate relative is going to have to shell out for your  very expensive funeral with extra costs for an excessively large coffin an additional pall bearers. However, if you are the owner of cats this won't be an issue. When you die they will simply eat you.

22 comments:

  1. If they get a tiger it will be over much sooner.

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  2. Fat people should get pet snails. Then if they did choose to take them for a walk, at least they will move at the same speed.

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  3. I bet it will take the cats a long time to eat them.

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  4. Replies
    1. I would love to stroke your pussy ....
      I could make it purr

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  5. I can't relate to fat people. Why do they let themselves get like that.

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  6. Perhaps McDonalds can do a cat and a big mac deal.

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  7. Imagine the smell when someone opens the door!

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  8. I have a cat. Should I be concerned?

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    Replies
    1. If it looks at you licking it's lips.... be worried...

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  9. I love the fat girl breaking the chair

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  10. Scarey. For what its worth, I think we should call it 'sugar bloat' not 'fat'. The clue to the solution is in the name then. Eat less sugar and carb = lose weight. Worked for me. Lost 12 kg in 11 weeks.

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